Breathing - It's Good!

Heart pounding, thoughts racing, I wonder to myself "Do I really have to do this?" 

Mistakes made, perfection not attained, I tell myself to try harder.

12:00 AM, go to bed. 6:30 AM, get out of bed. Another day, more opportunities. Bleary eyes, strange sentences, I don't make sense...

Sabbath comes, a day of rest, I sit in church - trying not to sleep. I woke up early again, going to bed late. 

Morning prayers, afternoon readings, evening pleadings...Am I even coping?

"Be still and know I am God," I hear.

 "Yes Lord, I love you, I am glad I worship you," I reply.

"Come to Me, all you who are heavy laden..." He whispers again.

 "I really appreciate that Lord...Diprotic acids vs triprotic acids, that reminds me of quatrains and iambic pentameter....Oh wait, I need to reply to Gabrielle about our group project...Oh sorry Lord, got distracted.Yes I definitely like giving You my burdens" 

"Hadassah...If My people would turn from their ways and hear My voice...!" 

"But I am busy! I have to be at work in an hour! But oh, I do want to come, I want to hear Your voice...Just to feel at peace for the rest of the day..." 

"So, come, and see what I can do." He challenges

I come, weary, worn, sick and weak. I tell the Lord how done I feel. I tell Him I am tired of being tired. Tired of having no time for anything. Tired of a pounding heart and racing thoughts. He shows me to Isaiah 40:28-31:

"Have you not known?

Have you not heard?

The everlasting God, the Lord,

The Creator of the ends of the earth,

Neither faints nor is weary.

His understanding is unsearchable.

He gives power to the weak,

And to those who have no might He increases strength.

Even the youths shall faint and be weary,

And the young men shall utterly fall,

But those who wait on the Lord

Shall renew their strength;

They shall mount up with wings like eagles,

They shall run and not be weary,

They shall walk and not faint."

"Behold, I am with you always!" I hear...Oh what peace! I saw Jesus toiling on earth for 33 years for my sake - for your sake. Going without comfort and companionship. Being tested on all points and scorned as a criminal. I saw the meek and tender Jesus bidding me to slow down, to contemplate Him and His perfection, rather then me and my schedule and imperfection. If I was to turn my eyes upon Jesus, and look full on His wonderful face, then the things of the world would go strangely dim, in the light of His glory and grace. And then peace would come!

In the cacophony which is daily, peace of mind is hard to find. I have found that peace in Jesus. He relieves my fears and anxieties. I still have lots to do and not enough time, but I have peace. And that is worth stopping for.

 I encourage you to do the same. I am sure this struggle is relateable to all of us on some level - the rat race that never ends. Quit the race, set aside the work, the school, the pursuit of dreams for a little bit - and hour! And abide with Jesus. Pick up the Bible, pray and seek the Lord with all your heart. Behold, He stands at the door and knocks, whoever opens the door, to him will He come inside and dine. Jesus has taken initiative to spend time with us. Why no do the same?